This addresses the second most popular question that often comes out as, "How did you get to the Netherlands?"
On a KLM direct flight from LAX, because I brought my three cats with me and the vet said a longer car ride to LAX where I could get a direct flight was better than the cats having to change planes. So, two wonderful women from my church, one having a roomy SUV for the 3 cages and my luggage, picked me up and drove me to LAX. Yes, that's how I got here. That's the literal answer.
The simplest and greatest answer is that the Lord directed my steps, as He always has. The mind of man plans his way but the Lord directs his steps. Proverbs 16:9 is one of my main verses I truly adopted in 1983.
The long answer, for those interested...Just like I had never even wanted to visit California, then ended up living there over 21 years, I felt the same about Europe. In 1998ish I got the bug to visit Europe, especially Netherlands and Ireland due to knowing more about my family's roots in those countries.
In the fall of 2000 my dear friend John's favorite Om, Uncle, Arjan from the Netherlands visited the US for the first time and came to San Diego to spend a weekend . John invited his friends to meet his Dutch uncle at The Field Irish Pub in San Diego, www.thefield.com. It's an authentic Irish pub with great food and on Sunday evenings there are Irish dancers. John and I Irish dance, he is VERY good, and know the dancers that dance on Sunday nights. When I arrived the only place to sit was a stool at the far head of the table where Arjan sat just to my right. Being a crowded table, our knees touched. Arjan knew only Dutch and the only other person at the table who knows Dutch was his sister who was seated diagonally from Arjan at the end of the other side. Everyone was talking, and it gets loud in The Field, of course all in English. Me, being the open, friendly, talking with my hands kind of person, used hand gestures to attempt communicating with him. Little did I know what my, to me simple, attempts at communication would lead to. The night ended, we went to our cars and when it was time to part I wanted Arjan to know I was glad to meet him and how important he is to his US family. At one point Arjan asked his sis something in her ear, then turned and kissed me on the lips. I thought, "Oh, yeah, that's right, Europeans kiss upon meeting and departing." It wasn't till I came here that I learned in the Netherlands it's three fake kisses on the cheek, one side, the other, then back to the first, you don't really kiss the cheek.
Shortly after that, John began teasing me, "You're Arjan's girlfriend." I thought...no way, the man is older and I've only gone for younger guys, speaks another language, and lives in another country across the ocean from where I moved to CA from! No way. Life went on and I finally felt I could leave my job with the Navy in military child development. I had so much leave stashed up I was unable to use, my parents had been dead for over 3 years and I still wasn't able to get the time to go back to Buffalo to get their house cleaned out, plus I wanted to travel. My leave would pay out, little did I know the chunk of it that would go to the federal government in taxes, but still I could live for a nice 9-12 month hiatus. Went to Buffalo, in the airport to return to San Diego as 9/11 happened--another story, so after two weeks ended up driving a beautiful Dodge Durango that fit everything I wanted from my parent's house, back to San Diego via Utah to visit John's Mom, Arjan's sis. She had to call her brother to have me talk to him, telling me how taken he was with me. I could tell on the phone he was like a young boy, still didn't know much English.
As flights resumed and the prices dropped, I thought, what a great time to take a trip or 2 to Europe. Called my FBI friend and asked what he thought and he said that, even with what happened, it was still safer to fly than drive and even safer as a result of 9/11 and "go for it". I figured I'd go to Ireland first but in looking at air fare, Amsterdam was much cheaper. So, made my plan. John told me I'd have to visit his family, specifically uncle, in Rotterdam and it would save me a few nights cost. So, his Mom called and I told her I'd plan for a long weekend in Rotterdam, thinking Arjan must work. She called him and called me back and said that he would like me to stay with him the entire time I was going to be here, 2 1/2 weeks. I knew I didn't want to do that and glad I had already planned the first few days in Netherlands. I asked if I would be safe with him and she assured me I would. "He won't do anything that you don't want him to."--So, he won't attack me in the night, phew. It was at this time I also found out that Arjan was retired. He was a carpenter and in his profession, at that time, they could retire at 55, not having any responsibilities but himself he took that opportunity. So I agreed to stay for five days.
End of February 2002 I came over, feel in love with the country the minute I stepped foot in it, felt like it was home, like this is where I come from. I went to the North East for a few days for an indoor flower festival, if I was coming over here I was determined to see some flowers! Took the train down to Rotterdam where Arjan was meeting me, it was snowing here that day. I could tell he was so excited that I was here. Still amazed at how well we communicated and how quickly he learned English, though it's heard on the tv and radio here so that helps. The second day I was here he sat next to me on the couch, told me how happy he was that I came to visit and put his arm around me. Then he laid out his plan of what we would do over the next two weeks till I left, telling me that I was free to leave at any time. He had made a neat plan out where I wouldn't be seeing all the touristy things, never made it to Amsterdam till my third time here. He was so kind and hospitable and began giving me kisses on the check, real ones. After four days of his wooing, I was falling in love and decided to spend the rest of my time here. I hadn't been treated so well by a man in an extremely long time.
The entire time I thought, "I could live here." and just prayed. As I returned home, I thought about what had transpired and was this just a vacation type fling or was this really something. After changing planes in Newark, I found that a Continental flight attendant was seated behind me on her way back home to San Diego from her trip. She was curious where those seating around her had originated. When I said Amsterdam, she told me that Continental was starting a new Houston to Amsterdam service so us West Coasters didn't have to travel all the way to Newark. Knowing Continental, I asked if there was a special opening deal and she said nothing had been announced yet but keep watching the site. I let Arjan know of the possibility and told him I would like to return for a month to see if this was for real. It was the weekend of the St. Patrick's Day activities in San Diego and when I came home Sunday night I checked Continental's site and there it was. This time I could fly for $342 round trip, only $21 more than my first time. And it's killing me writing these prices when it has been over $1100 for over a year.:(
Ok, I'm going...so came for a month early May-early June. And the rest is history. I came again for another month at Christmastime that year and was ready to move over here then but Arjan really wanted to see my life in San Diego before making that move. Due to a death in his family, that didn't end up happening till May 2004. He came, saw my house, meet many of my friends, went with me to my parent participation classes, etc. He couldn't believe how friendly and welcoming everyone was and told me that I couldn't leave this, he would move to the US. Returned home and quickly we both realized that it would be very difficult and costly. Because Arjan was on early retirement, he wouldn't receive it if residing in another country. Plus the health insurance wouldn't transfer so be astronomical in the US for him.
We pretty much ended up giving up but only for about 6 weeks in April/May 2005. Towards the end of that May, I received a call from him. He had finally received the insurance money from dropping and breaking my camera in front of the palace in Amsterdam back in 2003! He then told me how he couldn't sleep since we decided it was too hard and even the sleeping pills he got from the dr weren't helping. He told me to pray because we needed to be together. So I did and one morning when I was at my Starbucks, out of the blue as I read my devotions, I felt the Lord saying, "Go. Go there." Ok, we talked that night and Arjan told me he knew what we needed to do and that was for me to move over there if I was still willing to. I couldn't believe my ears confirming what I had sensed. So, first I thought September that year but then there was a wedding and that far in, I might as well stay for a last Thanksgiving. So, that's what I did. Left the Monday after Thanksgiving and here I am...still love living over here as difficult as it may be sometimes. The longer I live here, the more I think I'll stay, if they let me. Soon I'll be able to apply for Dutch citizenship or permanent residence. Because of all the talk of making everyone that's dual chose one nationality and the US is one country that allows it's citizens to renege their citizenship, we are thinking it is probably best I go with the permanent residence. We'll see when the time comes.
You never know where I may ultimately end up and I have stopped saying I'm never going anywhere because chances are, that's where I'd end up living!
