Heart Pillow Project

Before I tell you about the heart pillow project I do want to address the tragic plane crash near where I grew up. For those not familiar with Buffalo or who have visited me there, the crash was about 8 miles from where I lived. When I turned on my computer this morning and saw the news, my heart felt similar to when I was there on 9/11. I can just hear people talking about how they, their families and/or friends knew someone killed or a family member of someone killed. Then I just got a news alert from San Diego that the pilot catching a ride to Buffalo to visit his grandma is from San Diego. It's a very small world, not to mention the widow of a victim of 9/11, who is from the town I lived in, being one of the "only" 49 people on that plane. I thank God that it was not worse because it could have been in that particular area and for the wonderful, strong Buffalo community who will weather this with flying colors as they have done everything else that's come their way...mostly in the form of weather. Thoughts and prayers are with my Buffalo friends. On to the Heart Pillow Project...

At the first AWC meeting I attended, I met Celeste Brown. She introduced herself and when she heard I was here for a Dutch man, she attached right to me. Her "story" is a quite similar to mine. She was a single career woman who had never met a man she wanted to be with till she was 44 and met Jaap, still don't know the details of how that happened. Like me, she gave up her career, sold her house, and moved here when she was 45. She has been here 10 years, so definitely a good resource for me. She is president of the Federation of American Women's Clubs, the organization uniting AWC's around the world. The meeting started and soon Celeste was called up to talk about the Heart Pillow Project. Turns out Celeste had just recovered from having surgery and the treatment for breast cancer. Thankfully, her cancer was at a very early stage, involved no lymph nodes, and not invasive. She basically had a large lumpectomy.

Shortly after surgery, Celeste received a heart pillow from the American Women's Club of Denmark. It is a special heart with a deep "V" to fit under the breast. It's also very helpful in relieving pressure and pain from a shoulder belt in the car. Celeste wanted to know if our group would be interested in making pillows for the women in Leiden, where she lives near and has her doctor, and Den Haag. A group of us were very interested. People donated extra material they had, we scrounged for fiber fill-- not widely available here and when it is very expensive, but members brought some back from trips to the US and we found the stuffing from the large square pillows you can buy at the market 2/5 Euros works well--met on 3 Tuesday afternoons to cut, pin for sewing--which people with sewing machines took home to do, turn, stuff, and stitch the opening, cut out a heart shaped information card to go with them, package them in bags, and tie ribbons on the bags. We made a total of 105 and stashed them in a closet. None of us were familiar with them, though the website says they began in the US.

Today was the first delivery day where Leslie, Anu--an Indian allowed in as an associate member who volunteers more than most, and I met Celeste at Leiden University Medical Center where we had a meeting with Celeste's doctor, Gemma. Gemma is a lovely, kind Dutch woman who was amazed that we would make these for her patients.

Arjan was also surprised we would do something like this but I reminded him...that's what American's do. This is just another reason I wanted to become involved in this club, they do projects and fund raisers to give back to this community and country.

If you'd like to know more about the Heart Pillow Project or make one for someone you know, you can find info and the pattern at http://www.heartpillow.dk/. Besides the physical comfort it brings, it also brings emotional comfort that someone cares.



Stuffing & sewing


The Finished Product
Front: Eileen Back: Celeste, Sherry, me, Robin, Becky, Tina


Leslie, Celeste, Anu, & I making the delivery
Photo courtesy of Gemma


Gemma, oncologist specializing in women

AWC of The Hague

The American Women's Club of The Hague was begun in 1930 and in 1984 was able to buy this big house in the Scheveningen area of Den Haag on Nieuwe Duinweg. Though it has been here so long and I was aware of it from before I even moved here, I didn't become a member till October 2008.

What took me so long? I came here intent on integrating and not relying on Americans and insulating myself in a group of Americans. I wanted to learn the language and make Dutch friends, etc. Well, making friends with the Dutch is the topic for another day...but when I returned to the US for the first time this past summer and the people were just as nice as when I left, and they are, and I returned here with even a couple more American friends, I knew I needed those connections here. I know the language enough to communicate with people who don't speak any English and I read very well and write ok in Nederlands, I can venture into the Expat world and speak English and even Nederlands with Nederlanders or other expats. There is an American Women's Club in Rotterdam but I have heard the Den Haag group is nicer and does more. (It's also evident in their websites.)

In September I went to the "Feel At Home in Den Haag" fair and there was the AWC table and I said how I live in Rotterdam and one of two people at the booth comes from Zwijndrecht, south of Rotterdam where one of Arjan's niece's lives. These women were so friendly and welcoming...I now go to the Club just about every week, and sometimes 2 or 3 times, and have taken the Program Chair position, they wanted me to take one of the 2 open VP positions but I don't like the responsibilities of either. I have met some really neat people, some have been here a long time, married to a Dutchie, or one woman lived here with her American man for over 30 years, he died, and now she has a Dutch man. One that just joined is a Dutchie is divorced from an American, returning here after they divorced. She totally understands the Dutch thinking but also the American and missed the friendship that Americans give and have. Others are wives of American men here for work. You'll be seeing pictures and hearing about them in the future.

Today was our monthly meeting and lunch. Each meeting has a special program, usually with a special speaker, and today our member Jane, who is a volunteer at the Mauritshuis Royal Picture Gallery in Den Haag, gave a presentation titled Love, Romance, and Deception. It was very interesting. The Mauritshuis is a smaller art gallery mostly housing works of art from the Golden Age, mostly 16th-17th century. This is the home for Vermeer's The Girl with the Pearl Earring.

Jane was asked how she came to be so knowledgeable about and interested in art. Her story was interesting...an American who has lived here over 20 years with her Dutch man. She went to Trinity College in Dublin and studied Irish History, and she's not even Irish but finds their history most interesting and loves the music, we'll be talking further! She ended up in education then met her Dutchie and moved here and then said exactly how I feel, when you move to a new country not as a worker expat, you end up finding that you have to reinvent yourself, you just can't get jump into the profession you were practicing in your home country. So, she figured it was a good time to maybe try something else and ended up becoming very knowledgeable about Dutch art.

God only knows where I'll end up...there's a German member who has a PHD in Psychology, she has lived almost all over the world, but mostly America and Europe, she has a house right near the AWC, and she speaks 5 languages. She is working on research studying how the brain has changed as people no longer have to memorize things like telephone numbers. Ok...that totally lights my fire, especially because I've considered the same type of thing. Today she encouraged me so much by telling me that the average age of people in the Open University here is 54 and a woman there just earned her PHD in Psych at age 60. There is hope and even in NL! It did bring me back to my junior year sitting in my beloved advisor and professor's office and I clearly heard him, as if it was today, tell me that if I was going for a Bachelor's in Psych and wanted to remain in that field, I'd have to get a Masters and Doctorate, and how I left college not wanting to return, then in my 30's the bug came and think isn't leaving me...just took a detour.

Then Laurie drove me all the way home today, quite a treat. Typically she drops me at a tram stop or Central Station to get home. Laurie is my God send. She just moved to Rotterdam in January from Westport, CT. Her husband is a ship architect for an American Chemical shipping company that moved it's entire business and operations to Rotterdam the beginning of last year. Their youngest son was in his senior year so she stayed till he got squared away in college and then decided to wait till after the holidays to make the permanent move, but already has to return next week for a month. I love it because she likes it here so much and is learning so much...she doesn't want to return to the States yet, but a couple family weddings call. The other great thing is she's in my age group and she has a son who shares my birthday, which excited her, as well as me--finally someone born on my day instead of dying. The other good thing is that she doesn't live in the area so far North where most other Americans live, she lives a bit closer to us on the North side of the city and comes over to my South side to go to "my" Jumbo!, what I call the American supermarket here. Also, they are here for the long haul, at least till he retires in 15 years. Hooray, someone who isn't leaving in a year, 2, or 3 and that has an auto paid for by the company, including the gas!, yes, some people receive some high perks to come here, to be able to do things with. Because her husband is here for a job she was able to just trade her American license in for a Dutch one, something those of us here for a Dutchie aren't able to do. And maybe Laurie will turn out to be a person who will take care of the boys so Arjan and I can take a real vacation!